MONDAY NEWS ONE-LINERS

Hey gang, I’ve been absent from the site for a few days, so I thought I’d get you caught up on all the latest Bay-hem and other geek happenings with these quick one-liners. One link, one snarky comment – GO!

 

Viggo Mortensen is rumored to be circling the role of General Zod in Zack Snyder’s Superman reboot, The Man of Steel. It’s been scientifically proven there is nothing funny to say about Viggo Mortensen. Move on.

Justin Bieber: Never Say Never director Jon M. Chu tapped to direct G.I. Joe 2. Plans to cast Bieber in the film as Tunnel Rat have been met with hostility from Joe fandom.

Check out these International character posters for X-Men: First Class. You can tell these are Foreign posters from the lack of oversized fonts, photoshop-enhanced cleavage, fire, and explosions.

James Franco officially signs on to play the Wizard of Oz in Oz: The Great & Powerful. Kind of ironic, considering Franco was high as a hot-air balloon at the Oscars last night.

Michael Fassbender discusses the “kinda sorta, but not really, prequel to Alien“, Prometheus. No mention of why he is suddenly in more movies than Samuel L. Jackson, however.

New Green Lantern posters show more of the other Green Lantern Corps ring-wearers. You know what’s great about these? The subtlety.

Here’s some more set photos from The Amazing Spider-man, with Andrew Garfield in costume. Or is that Ellen Page? It’s hard to tell.

Michael Bay unveils Optimus Prime’s mentor, Sentinel Prime. Apparently, it makes perfect sense to Michael Bay that robotic beings can grow steel facial hair.

We’ve already seen a Transformer with testicles, another with a mustache, and a pair of ebonics-spewing, black stereotypes. Now there may be a redneck NASCAR Transformer with a mullet in Dark of the Moon. Unfortunately, plans for a Jewish stereotype Autobot named “Rabbi Prime” were scrapped at the pre-production stage.

Finally, here’s some details and spoilers for the film. I’ve also got some more spoilers not mentioned in the article:  John Tuturo participates in the first-ever Decepticon Bukkake sequence, Michael Bay affixed a 3D camera to Rose Huntington-Whiteley’s panties, the production depleted the city of Chicago’s entire supply of bronzer, and Michael Bay directed the entire film from the driver’s seat of a 1986 Ferrari in front of a giant wind turbine.

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