BREAKING NEWS: MICHAEL BAY IS STILL A MORON ran a story recently, in which several insiders close to the production on Bay’s latest Transformers shitbomb Dark of the Moon reported that there were issues with the 3-D footage. Well, it didn’t take long  for everyone’s favorite nutty director to respond: 

“Wow, I read these morons on the internet who think they are in the know. “We have have problems with our 3D????” Really? Come into my edit room and I will show you beautiful 3D. There has never been a live action show that has pushed the boundaries of 3D like Transformers 3. We shot the entire movie with 3D cameras. I actually loved shooting in 3D. I will give full details of my process and why I liked 3D in the next week right before the Transformers announcement piece comes out on Tron and Narnia… And don’t watch this movie in 2D, we made it for 3D.”

Of course, this is coming from the same idiot who publicly derided and dismissed 3-D  a year ago:

“I think 3-D is going to be a fad. I personally don’t like 3-D. The glasses impair your peripheral vision. If the studios want to push any technology, it should be IMAX. That’s much more immersive.”

Bravo Michael, way to stick to your guns.  Personally, I don’t give a shit how the 3-D looks in this sure-to-be trashterpiece. What I am really dying to know is, just how many humans are going to be covered in various fluids expunged from robot genitals in this, the third and final chapter in Michael Bay’s epic Transformers saga? A saga, mind you, that has thus far included:

  • Skids and Mudflaps – two bumbling, illiterate, ebonics-spewing Black stereotype robots, that almost single-handedly set race relations between whites and African-Americans back about 200 years.
  • Humans getting pissed on by robots.
  • A lengthy sequence in the second film centering around Shia Lebouf’s parents as they mistakenly eat pot brownies and stumble around a college campus.
  • A giant Transformer with wrecking balls for testicles
  • An insane mad scientist Transformer with a German accent.
  • Completely incoherent editing/storytelling.

Thank you Michael Bay, for these glorious gifts. /Film has the full story.


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