Ed. Note: Lo Pan’s Link Dump is a weekly roundup of the latest geek culture headlines, ripped off gathered from various websites and news sources, all brought to you by your favorite 3,000 year old Chinese sorcerer, David Lo Pan!
Kirsten Dunst says she’s back on board for Spider-Man 4. I don’t share the vitriol and contempt for Dunst that the rest of the Internet community has for her (constantly referring to her as “fug” or “Snaggletooth”, etc.), but I certainly wasn’t rooting for her to come back to the franchise either. The video clip in this interview isn’t going to win her any new friends or help her change her perception as a self-involved moron, that’s for sure. “That was two villains combinded, wasn’t it?” Combinded? WTF???
Check out the music video for Jack White and Alicia Keys’ Quantum of Solace theme song “Another Way To Die”. Pfft…lame. Everyone knows this is the best James Bond theme and video. Alicia Keys is liquid sex though.
John Favreau spills a whole lot of Iron Man sequel info, and had this to say regarding Tony Stark’s alcoholism storyline:
“I don’t think we’ll ever do the Leaving Las Vegas version, but it will be dealt with.”
I had a feeling he would pussy out when it came to Iron Man’s battle with the bottle. I’m sure he felt the heat from the Hollywood suits who didn’t want to have anything to do with a raging drunk superhero ruining their lighthearted cash cow. Don’t get me wrong, Iron Man kicked ass and Favreau did a tremendous job, but Stark’s struggles with booze is the defining aspect of his character and the story deserves the full treatment.
My ideal Iron Man sequel would go like this: In the wake of his “coming out” as Iron Man, Tony Stark sinks deeper and deeper into alcoholism, spiraling out of control, paving the way for Jim Rhodes to don the War Machine armor in order to stop the threat of the Crimson Dynamo or other villains that belong to the “10 Rings” organization. War Machine gets his ass kicked and needs help from Tony, who heroically returns as Iron Man at the end of the movie after a heart to heart with Pepper and defeats the enemies side by side with War Machine. Then in the third movie, the Mandarin reveals himself as the leader of the 10 Rings and the huge threat behind everything that has transpired. Hire me Favreau! I’m money baby!
Finally, The CW announced plans for a new show called The Graysons which would chronicle the life of Dick Grayson and his circus acrobat family before they died and he became Robin. Think that “Dawson’s Circus” idea sounds like ass in a can? Well, it gets worse. Smallville executive producers Kelly Souders and Brian Peterson are behind the show and The Graysons will be similar in style and structure to that weekly televised abortion.
Ugh. I bet you a million bucks Dick “DJ” Grayson (Yes, that’s what they’re calling him) will be a sullen, rebellious, emo kid who resents his circus life and will find romance and solve crimes in each new town he visits with the circus. He’ll probably encounter lame, watered-down, non-costumed versions of classic Batman villains too. Wonderful. Wouldn’t a series about a young Bruce Wayne traveling the world learning martial arts and detective skills in his preparation to become Batman be a far better premise for a show? Oh wait, that idea actually makes sense. Nevermind.