Tom Brady’s A Baby Daddy

Brady&MonyahanNew England Patriots star quarterback/hot model dater Tom Brady is apparently about to become a daddy. Actress Bridget Moynahan, who Brady dated for two years prior to breaking up with her in December, made the announcement that she was pregnant to New York Post columnist Liz Smith. The question I have is, did Tom know she was pregnant before he dumped her? If he did, wow, that’s a classless move. Maybe LaDanian Tomlinson was right about this team having no class. Way to sneak one past the uprights right before the game ends there, Tom.

One thing’s for sure, this kid is going to have a charmed fucking life. If it’s a boy, when puberty hits he’ll have more cheerleaders on him than the team bus. If it’s a girl, she’ll be some new breed of uber model with the genes she inherits. The other kids in his class won’t have a chance. Just picture this conversation:

Kid #1: “My Dad’s a doctor and my Mom’s a lawyer!”

Kid#2: “So what? My Dad owns an airline and my Mom’s a fashion designer!”

Brady’s kid: “Pfft. Whatever. My Dad has three Super Bowl rings, he bangs supermodels every day, and my Mom was in I, Robot! Oh, and she’s a model, too”

The child of Brady and Monyhan is going to be such a hot commodity in fact, that the NFL’s worst team, the Oakland Raiders, are already considering making a move in April regardless of the child’s sex. “With the first selection in the 2007 NFL draft, the Oakland Raiders select Tom Brady’s unborn fetus.”

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